|exhibit index > 1972 index||« prev | next »|
Understanding, A Talk by Avatar Adi Da Samraj
The person in whom this entire strategy has broken down looks like a pane of glass. There is no idiosyncrasy in such a one, no resistance. That entire structure of Force in which the person lives is open. But when you meet the usual man or woman, you immediately experience the limitation on life that he or she will accept or demand in your relationship to him or to her. And this tends to stimulate, by reaction, your own limitation. So everybody complains that ordinary experience with people is unsatisfying. But when that contraction opens even a little, the Force of Delight and of Love begins to flow, and the obstructions begin to break down, until, finally, the "person" is shattered. At last, the entire ordinary form of his or her existence is absolutely destroyed. The person no longer lives from the point of view of this contraction and all of the assumptions about life that it requires. Conscious awareness has fallen out of the usual form, and the "Point of View" is that of the Divine Self, the Heart, the "Radical" Intuition of Reality, or Real God. Such a one no longer contains the least trace of a separate self sense. It does not even tend to arise. And yet, the apparent functions of life remain.
Those who live in the genuine Spiritual community of My devotees have value for others who come into contact with them. They will only allow people to live as the Heart, to function in relationship with the Force of the Heart. They will not indulge a person's strategy. They will provoke the crisis of his or her suffering.
[At this point the young man who had been questioning Avatar Adi Da got up to leave. He had obviously felt quite antagonistic toward Avatar Adi Da. It was not clear why he felt it was necessary to assume a superior manner, but his contempt as well as his insecurity had been made plain to all. After he left, many of those present expressed their relief with laughter and criticism, but Avatar Adi Da continued to remind them that the drama they had just observed was a kind of exaggerated version of the process that is enacted between the Guru and every one of his or her devotees.]
AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: It is always the same. Every one is like that. He was not extraordinary. He just played the obvious drama that he played. He was good. I appreciated his questions. It was good that something that dramatic or emotional could take place. You should read the documents which record the history and teaching in the Ashrams of various teachers, such as Ramana Maharshi or Ramakrishna. It is always the same thing. This Ashram is not going to be any different.
QUESTIONER: Would you please speak about this contraction, and how the technical practice that you call "self-Enquiry" passes beyond all the forms of separation?
AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: Many words could be used. The traditions describe different "knots" that are opened, and the goal of Spiritual life is often said to be the opening of these various knots. There is a knot in the navel, a knot in the heart, and a knot in the head. There are many knots, but these are the primary regions discussed in the traditions. What they are really talking about are functional forms of contraction in the organic and subtle processes of life. The chakras, or subtle centers through which the life-force moves, are like the shutter of a camera. When they are contracted and closed, no force flows. If there is a force trying to make them open, the resistance of the contraction "creates" pain, heat, and all the various Yogic manifestations, many of which are described in The Knee of Listening. As a living center of consciousness opens a little bit more, then the mind begins to get a little "flowery". So there are little visionary things, and perceptions and insights. When it is completely open, there is just the Blissful, Divine Force of Consciousness Itself. Then the life-force moves on, until it hits the next obstruction. The life-force is ultimately the Force of the Very Heart, the Real-God-Life, the Power of Reality, moving through the various centers of life, which are chronically obstructed or contracted. And the various experiences associated with the release of these centers characterize the process of Yoga, or the traditional paths of Spiritual life. But what is ultimately the case is not all of these experiences. They just take place because there are obstructions. If there are no obstructions, there is only Absolute Consciousness, no dilemma, nothing to be accomplished. There is no body in which to accomplish anything. Therefore, one in whom understanding and self-Enquiry are perfected passes from limited and even extraordinary forms of knowledge and experience into the intuitive and spontaneous life of Reality, or Real God.
QUESTIONER: Is the activity of the mind and thought an obstruction?
AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: What is your experience?
QUESTIONER: My experience is that, in spite of what I will or wish, I have many strange thoughts.
AVATAR ADI DA SAMRAJ: If you close the eyes meditatively, you turn yourself mainly to concentration on mind-forms. But if your eyes are open, there are people, functional demands, and the entire cosmic event. And while you are sitting there with your eyes open, you will become aware that all of this thought is also going on. You will begin to feel, almost see, how thought slides between you and all contact with the moving world. Thought is an actual, solid obstruction. It is a form of matter, a modification of Energy. What you call "the mind" is wavelengths of Force, functioning, taking on forms, through the subtle processes of electrical interchange. So when you have a thought, you have modified the Energy flowing through the brain regions. In other words, you have contracted, and you are always concentrating on that contraction. If you pinch your arm, attention centers at the point of pain. If you have a thought, attention centers at the point of thought. Whenever there is distraction by a particular entity, form, or function, there is loss of direct awareness, of relationship. When there is concentration, everything else is excluded. The "ego" is just another form of concentration, of distraction. In the case of the ego, the distraction is not a particular thought but the separate self sense that all contraction generates. The ego is an activity, not an entity. The ego is the activity of avoidance, the avoidance of relationship.
Therefore, any thought, any function, anything that "creates" form, that appears as form, that seems to be form, is produced by concentration--or contraction. Thus, apart from understanding, all processes, even life itself, tend to become an obstruction. The root of it all is called the "ego", but it is actually contraction, in countless forms, endured unconsciously. The unconsciousness is the key, not the acts of concentration themselves (which are only more or less functional). Apart from responsible consciousness, or present, conscious understanding, functional contraction tends to become the assumed condition of life. Unconscious contraction "creates" separation, which manifests as identification, or the sense of separate self.
The root of true Spirituality is not some activity, like desire, that seeks to get you to the "super-Object". Genuine Spirituality is understanding of the entire process of motivation. It is to re-cognize the root of it--this contraction, this separation. When you no longer have any more options, when you have worn yourself out playing your game, and you have tried all the techniques and methods, paths and lifestyles, strategies and places to go, all the forms of concentration, whatever they are, then all of that begins to break down. You discover that you just do not have the "jazz" left to really carry it on anymore. You find yourself more depressed, just a little bit too depressed to meditate or to hunt for sex. You just do not have the jazz, the necessary fire of motivation. Then upsetness begins to overwhelm you. The crisis begins to come on. You do not really have a path (or a strategy) anymore. You may talk a lot about it, feel a lot about it. It remains a part of your mind, but you do not really have a path (or a strategy) any longer. That is really the most hopeful sign. The ego is beginning to rot! When fruit begins to rot, then it falls with seed into the earth. But as long as one is very righteous, as long as one has got one's game to play, one is not ripe. It is only when the game begins to kick you in the face that you begin to soften up, bruise a little bit, feel your fear, your suffering, your dilemma, this constant upset of all your mortality.
You are all going to die. You are all going to lose this present awareness, this present enjoyment. I cannot endure that dilemma from day to day. From the moment I was born, that upset Me. I was not the least interested in tolerating moment to moment existence as that kind of suffering. Life was not worth the involvement if its summation had to be death, zero. What difference does it make how fulfilled I can get if I must fall out the bottom, arbitrarily? Everything is wonderful today. But you wake up tomorrow and the world of lovely friends is delivered to you dead, the insane parcels of everything disappearing. So all righteousness, all ordinary Spirituality, all the search for consolation, is nonsense. It is a refusal. It is un-Real.
The usual perception is that of the agonizing fact of identification, the act that is ego, this refusal of one another, this lovelessness, and this living craziness. And all of your ordinary processes are bound up with that craziness until you begin to get sick of it. Then you are no longer talking about your technique, your Yoga, how marvelous it is and how you are going to get there, "everything is so soul-beautiful", and all this crap. You will become obsessed with your darkness, your heaviness. You will try to feel good, but you know you feel lousy. You really feel upset. It is really bad. It is really an annoyance. You are only upset, so what difference does the search make? If you go through that long enough, you begin really to get upset, and your meditation becomes concentration on your upset. Whereas previously you were always playing your game to avoid that upset, now you cannot do anything but be upset. And while you are meditating on your upsetness, you happen to get involved here, with Me, and you get even more and more upset all the time. You come to Me, and I make you more upset. You think you are supposed to be having a fantastic Spiritual experience here, becoming more and more fulfilled. But when you come around, people yell at you. They call your attention to your crazy game. You are trying to do your best, but everybody is hitting you over the head. All such experience is very aggravating, but it begins to reinforce the genuine meditation that has now started to go on in you. It is this crisis, this falling apart, this rot. And it will persist, until you begin to observe, somehow, this activity of yours.
When you begin to see what you are doing, when you begin to re-cognize it, you will see it first of all in very direct, human terms. You will see it in the simple, human, practical things that you do. Later, you will begin to see it in subtler terms. You will observe the entire quality of your mind, your ordinary activity, your game, the drama, the event that is always going on, until you begin to see it most precisely and very subtly. When you see it absolutely, that is "radical" understanding. When you see the thing itself, the simple thing, that is the end of it. You fall apart. You scream, or you cannot say anything, but it just ends. All of a sudden, the entire process is not going on anymore. And this apparent Event, unlike all other apparent forms of action in the conditionally manifested worlds, is not followed by a re-action.
In The Knee of Listening, I have described My Divine Re-Awakening. When there was this simple, "radical" turnabout, there was nothing about it that would have appeared remarkable to anyone who might have observed Me. I did not smile. I did not feel "high". There was no reaction, because there was not anything left over of the thing that now was thrown away. There was no thing to which I could react. There was no one to react, to feel good about it, happy about it. There was no particular emotion. The Heart was all. Its quality became more and more apparent. There was a preliminary period of that fundamental Enjoyment which lasted for perhaps several months. During that time there was no longer this entire complex life in dilemma, but I did not really function in any manner different than before. I did not experience any comparative impression about what had occurred. I did not really interpret it clearly and fully for a good period of time, even though I Consciously Enjoyed a State that was untouched, unqualified, by any event or circumstance. That State of Enjoyment would seem remarkable in Itself. But I had not begun to function as It in relation to conditionally manifested life. Only when I did so, and then only gradually, was I able to estimate and Know what had occurred. It was as if I had walked through Myself. Such a State is perfectly spontaneous. It has no means to watch Itself. It has no means to "internalize" or structure Itself. It is Divine "Madness". The Real Self, the Heart, is Perfect "Madness". There is not a jot of form within It. There is no thing. No thing has happened. There is not a single movement in Consciousness Itself. And that is Its Blissfulness. It was not the fact that certain functions of "internal" life had been stimulated. It was peculiarly free of vision, movement, and all the blissful phenomena characteristic of the activities of the Yoga-Shakti. And when such phenomena did happen to arise, they were of another kind, or they were Known from a new "Point of View". Their qualities had become cosmic and universal rather than (in the limited Yogic sense) "personal" in nature. Until there is only Real God, the Living One.
|« prev | next »|